Thursday, March 27, 2008

paula's dad died

Roland is dead. English Roland at 75. He checked into Victoria Hospital with abdominal pain and and exited10 days later a corpse. Pancreatitus was the official cause of death. I watched him go with Paula, her brother Mark and her sister Amanda. Their mother, Roland's long estranged ex-wife, vacationed in Arizona.

The first day we visited Roland in London there was a 50/50 chance he'd pull through, fight back from his coma like state. The waiting room was pleasant. A volunteer shepherded us kindly. Jacob jumped online the courtesy computer station. I drew as Paula commiserated with her siblings.

After visiting Roland for a 1/2 hour we all took a break and headed to the cafeteria. We caught up on family news and Paula and her brother and sister swapped sentimental Dad stories. I pulled out my sketchbook and scanned the room. It was hard to draw Mark. Impossible really. He's like a jittery ghost.

Amanda was easier. Perhaps because her features are so similar to Paula, that and her vanity. The food was horrible. Jacob scarfed up his plastic fries and colored fructose liquid.

My brother Mike has a new house in London. We visited him after the hospital and I coughed all over everything. His wife Ann got sick soon after. We agreed it was the worst flu of our lives.


A huge crowd attended the wake. Roland was very popular and highly respected for his union activism and lifelong devotion to the liberal left New Democratic Party. He had been repeatedy invited to run for office over the years but always declined because of closet skeletons. Instead he became a mentor, much beloved, and a behind the scenes political power broker of significance, largely benign.

Paula's eulogy moved both friends and family. Some close to Roland, intimately familiar with the Parris's tragic family history, privately shared with Paula their sympathies and respect.

After the union hall emptied the family drove in 3 cars to the Thames river, which briskly snakes through London. We scuttled over the icy ground carrying Roland's ashes onto a bridge. We dropped him into the cold rushing water. Some of Roland landed on the foundation of the bridge, most flowed northwestward. Goodbye. I think I liked him, but I wish he had taken better care of Paula, protected her. But it seems he could barely take care of himself.

3 comments:

Paula Eisenstein said...

I love your post about my dad dying. I love the funereal tone. I love your drawing of my dad on his death bed. It's beautiful.

You inspired my to write about it on my blog. Remember my blog? It's still there! I wrote on it.

Blogs are BS. said...

Wonderful drawings. Always such strong emotion.

Unknown said...

tremendous work